Protocol for marriage with children

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Evelyn Carpenter

Gabriel Pujari

How to organize a wedding when you already have children? Until a few years ago, getting married in a church or in a white wedding dress, if you already had a family, was not very common. Fortunately, times have changed and today it is not only possible to say "yes" in the presence of your children, but they also have an essential role in the marriage ceremony.

From carrying chalkboards, to handing their parents the wedding rings to be blessed by the priest or received by the master of ceremony, if they have children they wonder how to include them in the wedding celebration, check out these 7 ideas for taking a leading role in your marriage .

    1. Walk down the aisle together

    Who gives away the bride if she already has children? Whether they are children or teenagers, their children will undoubtedly be the most excited about their parents' marriage. If they are not too young, they can accompany them as they get ready in the bedroom, and then walk down the aisle together.

    For example, instead of having the bride and groom enter, surprise your guests with a family wedding entrance with your children. Or, if you have two children, split each parent's part of the way down the aisle. This way, each one will have the spotlight they deserve. Whatever way you choose, it will be very symbolic for the children to accompany them. in this first part of the marriage.

    Erick Severeyn

    2. As pages

    If they decide to assign them the role of pages, there are several roles that your children will be able to play during the marriage ceremony These include carrying baskets of flowers or chalkboards with phrases before the bride enters, signs that say, for example, "Here comes the love of your life. They can also carry the wedding rings, the Bible or, if they are older, participate by reading a psalm. At the end of the ceremony, meanwhile, a good idea is for them to be the first to come out and throw petals to mark the end of the ceremony.way to the newlyweds.

    3. During a symbolic ceremony

    It is increasingly common to include some symbolic ceremony in marriage, be it the candle ceremony, the planting of a tree, the ritual of wine or the tying of hands. All of them, very emotional ceremonies in which your children will also be able to participate.

    And why not include your children in the first dance as well? If you want to immortalize that moment in a very special way, improvise a song or, better yet, prepare a simple choreography with your little ones to surprise your family and friends. Now, if you prefer to make them participate in the moment when you break the wedding cake, give your children the first piece, then taste it yourself and then invite the rest of the guests.

    Daniel Esquivel Photography

    4. At the banquet

    As there is no defined protocol regarding marriages with children, there are three options that work well when it comes to getting them involved On the one hand, sit the children at the presidential table next to the parents and in-laws, so that a single table is formed with the members of the closest family nucleus. A second alternative is to set up a sweetheart table, but this time including your children, that is, instead of it being a table just for the newlyweds, more seats are incorporated.

    Or, on the other hand, designate a special children's table where your children will have a special distinction, for example, their names marked on the chairs. This way, although they will not be at the presidential table, they will feel equally important.

    5. Entertainment

    If you have small children, Ideally, other children of similar ages should also attend so that they don't get bored. Therefore, the best thing to do is to prepare a play area for them, which will depend on the time and style of the wedding you intend to hold. If you are getting married, for example, in a plot with large gardens, you can hire inflatable games, such as slides, trampolines, mini climbing walls or ball pools.

    However, if you have less space, set up a table with notebooks and pencils for coloring, puzzles, legos and other toys. If your budget allows, you can even find expert monitors that you could hire to entertain the children, either through dynamics or face painting, among other ideas.

    6. Clothing

    Although it all depends on the age, the key is that your children feel comfortable and at ease with the chosen wardrobe. For example, if you are going for a rustic wedding, you can choose a shirt and shorts for the boys and light tulle dresses for the girls.

    Or another option, if you like the matching outfits trend, is to combine some of your accessories with the little ones' outfits. That is, if the boutonniere or the bouquet of flowers will be red, incorporate that color in some way in your children's outfits. It's a good idea also in case the children are older.

    Aloriz Photographs

    7. Time to rest

    Finally, if you have children and the wedding will be during the day, surely your children will have fun and will not feel the passing of the hours sharing with other children and enjoying the Candy Bar. However, if you decide to celebrate the wedding in the afternoon / evening, it is likely that the little ones are exhausted after the ceremony and the banquet, and want to go to sleep. Faced with this, the best thing to do is to look for withtime a trusted person to take care of them for the rest of the night. Or, if you don't want to be too far away from them, then the option is to choose a location with rooms so that your children can rest right there.

    Organizing a wedding when you already have children means that you can involve them in an active way. From the proposal onwards, your children will be happy to participate in the celebration. However, make sure that they don't feel pressured and, on the contrary, are comfortable with the tasks they have to do.

    Evelyn Carpenter is the author of the best-selling book, All you need for your marriage. A Marriage guide. She has been married for over 25 years and has helped countless couples build successful marriages. Evelyn is a sought after speaker and relationship expert, and has been featured in various media outlets including Fox News, Huffington Post, and more.